healing-relationships

Gottman Method Couples Package

“I don’t feel like my partner ‘gets’ me.”

“My partner and I are always fighting about the same thing, over and over.”

“They want kids, but I don’t.”

“They had an affair and I don’t know if we’ll ever be able to move past this.”

“I don’t feel seen or heard in our relationship.”

“Every disagreement leads to bringing up the past to hurt each other.”

When it comes to our romantic relationships, there’s two things I look for when working with couples: those who say they do nothing but argue, and those who say they “never argue.” A hard truth is that disagreements are an inevitable part of being with someone we love. We aren’t always going to see eye-to-eye with things.

However, if a couple can’t seem to find common ground or communicate in a healthy way, that’s a red flag. On the flipside, if a couple tells me they “never argue”, that’s a sign of being emotionally disconnected in the relationship.

Then, there are the Relationship Masters – these are the couples who know how to recognize and overcome conflict, how to “fight fair”, how to put their Egos aside, and how to hold a safe space for each other’s needs.

There are several common causes of relationship conflict which often include:

  • Differences in needs for personal space and connection
  • Setting boundaries with in-laws or other family
  • Balancing socialization and intimacy
  • Sex and emotional connection
  • Money
  • Parenting/children
  • Differences in communication style
  • Differences in attachment style and attachment needs
  • Understanding each other’s trauma
  • Imbalance of perceived power in the relationship
  • Infidelity

The Gottman Method™ is an industry leader in helping couples increase connection, increase intimacy and thrive in their relationship because it teaches, educates, and helps build relational skills that can help benefit most couples. Plus, as a trained clinician with over 2 decades in the fields of psychology and Behavior Science, I additionally implement behavioral modalities that not only teach, but provide the blueprint for how to maintain these skills.

9-Week Intensive Couples Relationship Coaching includes:

PHASE 1: Assessment & Session 1

An important first step is to assess your relationship and to develop baseline data across several relational domains. This may include formal, or informal assessments to help get an idea of each partner’s feelings and needs as they relate to your relationship. This is a critical step as it helps your coach and both you and your partner gain awareness into where your relationship may need some fine-tuning and where your relationship strengths are.

As your relationship coach, I will then evaluate your baseline data and create an action plan that targets specific relational goals and areas for you and your partner. This may include role playing, homework assignments, or structured exercises that are completed in session.

PHASE 2: Individual Sessions (sessions 2 & 3)

Next, your relationship coach will meet with you and your partner individually to get an idea of both of your personal histories, to hear your stories, and to discuss your unique relationship goals and concerns regarding your relational needs.

PHASE 3: Discussion, Couples Coaching & Goal Monitoring (sessions 4 – 9)

These sessions are critical for helping build solid relational skills which may include: recovery and reconnection after an affair, feeling seen and heard, conflict resolution, understanding each other’s specific individual needs both within the relationship and individually, recognizing and assessing past trauma and its influences in the relationship, building intimacy, and exploring other key areas to foster relational connection.

Many couples find their experience with couples relationship coaching to be extremely positive, and continue coming back for “refresher” appointments to fine-tune their new mastery skills. Remember, when both partners are fully invested in maximizing a healthy connection with each other, relationship coaching gives you the perfect safe space to speak up, to feel seen, to feel heard, and to reconnect with your partner on a deep and intimate level. Equally important, is that both partners show up on time to session, have any insights or relationship questions ready for their coach, and have completed any assignments prior to their session.

While Gottman™ Method couples relationship coaching is research-based, empirically supported and provides actionable tools to elevate your relationship with your partner, it is not for everyone. I do not work with couples experiencing past or current domestic violence as these situations require more intensive intervention.

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